Friday, 17 April 2009

"Cutting Edge"

Myspace rules. Here's an exchange with Playground Magazine (me either). It's pretty amazing. It's like the nineties or something. See how many times "cutting edge" is mentioned. Buckle up:

To: MALE BONDINGhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
Date: 08 Apr 2009, 14:45
Subject:Interested in featuring Male Bonding on the Playground
magazine compilation CD
Hi Male Bonding
Found out about you guys from NME new music. Really interested in your music and what your doing. I'm approaching you about a rare opportunity that's come up to get featured on our magazine The Playground which has a 10,000 circulation all across London to not only all the city's venues, bars, galleries, stores and cool hangouts but also over 750 industry contacts (record labels, PR, booking agents, management companies) covering virtually the entire network of the London music industry.

Basically we cover what's cutting-edge, up and coming and exciting in music/fashion/art/theatre. On top of the magazine we do hugely popular events at renowned venues such as Proud Galleries in Camden and 93 Feet East hosting bands such as Ipso Facto, The JOY Formidable, KASMS and Eddy Temple-Morris pulling in over 4,000 people a month.We've also just launched a live broadcasting station-broadcasting all of our events live on theplayground.co.uk.

We're doing a covermount CD for the upcoming issue featuring the best up and coming alternative bands in the underground scene and we feel that one of your tracks would completely represent what our brand portrays. There's also scope to get a review piece and feature in the magazine. Rates start at 200pounds. Obviously this is huge exposure for the band.

It would be great to discuss this further, let me know

Sub-editor, the Playground magazine
National and Regional Press/Radio
Events
GlobalNet Records


So we're like:

From: MALE BONDING
To: the Playground
Date: 08 Apr 2009, 18:31
Subject: RE: Interested in featuring Male Bonding on the Playground magazine compilation CD
sorry - are you asking us to pay £200 to be featured on your comp cd?
i'm confused.


And they say:


Hi
Thanks for your reply. Yes there's a charge because normally record labels cover the costs whereas the idea behind the covermount CD is to give up and coming bands at the cutting-edge of the scene who we personally approach exposure; since it's a free magazine with a 10,000 circulation and is mailed to over 750 industry contacts across the country, there are costs incurred. Being confirmed at the moment are:
Dead Wolf Club –The Agency Group
We Were Promised Jetpacks – Fat Cat Records, Indian PR
Officer Kicks – We Make Things
Soho Dolls- AG records
Official Secrets Act- One Little Indian
Tubelord – Coda agency
XX teens – Electric Proms, Mute Records
We are The Physics – This is Fake DIY
Prego- Dance To The Radio Records

Alongside these are Lovvers, Black Lips, Heads.Hearts.
If you'd like to discuss anything feel free to e-mail/give me a call. What's your email so I can send you the information pack for you to browse through if you'd prefer?

Best,


Wow, information pack to browse, 750 industry contacts. Heavy. So anyway, we forget about it ignore it whatever...and back they come:


Hi guys

I've been speaking to you about featuring you guys on the compilation CD with the upcoming issue of the magazine, which you expressed interest in. It would be great to discuss this - - let me know. At this point with the deadline looming on Friday we've had a really strong response and we've only got a limited few spaces left. These acts are among those being confirmed th the moment, it would be great to add your name alongside these:

Soho Dolls- AG records
Official Secrets Act- One Little Indian
Prego- Dance To The Radio Records
Dead Wolf Club -The Agency Group
We Were Promised Jetpacks - Fat Cat Records, Indian PR
Officer Kicks - We Make Things
XX teens - Electric Proms, Mute Records
We are The Physics - This is Fake DIY
Also- Lovvers, Heads.Hearts, Pulled Apart By Horses, amongst a host of others -this is barely half the list

I've sent the info across but it would be great to discuss this- - otherwise I'll assume you're not interested

Regards, look forward to speaking with you soon


Bored now. Like to knock it on the head now:

From: MALE BONDING
Date: 14 Apr 2009, 23:24
Subject: RE: Interested in featuring Male Bonding on the Playground magazine compilation CD
we are NOT interested in paying to be on a compilation.


Back they come, something about brand integrity...and chuck another "cutting edge" in there:

Hi guys

The issue with the cost is that it works in the same way as advertising space as is normally the case with covermounts. Record labels normally cover the costs but because we're also opening up to give talented unsigned bands that we feel are at the cutting-edge of the undergound scene the opportunity to jump onboard as well, we cover the costs.Since it's a free magazine with a 10,000 distribtuion including the massive 800+ mailout to all the individual industry contacts, there is a charge.

We only approach bands we want on the CD, that's why we contacted you, especially for the track 'pumpkin'. We want to keep the integretity of our brand - we also do huge The Playground nights in Shoreditch and Camden with bands, burlesque, performance art, madness, and just launched a live broadcasting station- as we're all about what's exciting fresh and new at the cutting-edge of music, fashion, art and a dabble of theatre.

There's a possibility we may be flexible with the cost as we're really into Male Bonding (that sounded a bit phallic!) but because we've had such a strong response with this from a range of bands I could let you know in a couple of days if you're interested.

What's your address? I can send you the magazine if you haven't seen it around already

All the best,
Sub-editor, the Playground magazine


Ok, one final "NO THANKS" from us then:

still totally not interested. totally against our beliefs - however you dress it up, you are just charging bands to pay for your business, which is fine if bands want to play that game, but we don't.

i've worked for music magazine that don't charge bands to feature on covermounts - they fund their magazine through brand advertising rather that trying to take money from the one thing they should be trying to support.

so, once again - thanks, but no thanks.


Oh hello, it's the big guns...'Managing Director'!!!!:

Tell that to Artrocker and Kerrang! Thanks guys

Managing Director
Management
National and Regional Press/Radio
Events


A rude word:

haha do you think were fucking stupid? We really don't care or need or want to be in it. If Artrocker or Kerrang! asked us to pay to be on a covermount we would do the same. Dinosaurs

Oops, sorry about the rude word managing director:


i'd like to apologise for swearing. but please don't contact us about this comp again





And the last word goes to Playground magazine. Well done guys:

To: MALE BONDING
Date:15 Apr 2009, 18:13

Subject:RE: Interested in featuring Male Bonding on the Playground
magazine compilation CD
Sorry guys, we do apologise. We'd like to put you on for free. HAAAAA!!!!


Awesome.

7 comments:

chief sosati said...

yo awesome blog post
exposing some media twats
trying to get you to pay £200
for a fucking comp
almost as strange as the one band im in getting offered to play the oblivians/gories pre party but we still had to pay to get into the festival to watch them ie: like 30-50 quid each ????

johnwebb said...

pay to play! amazing x

An Experiment On A Bird In The Air Pump said...

Playground are BAD news. We played their night at Proud as part of the Selfish Cunt tour and a) Only 1 band out of 5 were given a soundcheck, b) No bands out of 5 were given the promised fee which resulted in all bands surrounding the city slicker promoter and giving him hell. I, personally, threatened to shit in his mouth. Surprisingly, we were presented with our agreed fee around 2 minutes later......

lorriesplash said...

"cool hangouts"
"integretity"
"Also- Lovvers, Heads.Hearts, Pulled Apart By Horses, amongst a host of others -this is barely half the list" [of people we are also clearly trying to convince to pay to be on our comp who don't want to be]

amazing saturday afternoon lols

Boris said...

Phallic? I believe the word the douchebag was looking for is 'homoerotic'. What wankers.

Conan said...

yeeaaaahhh wooooo. Good work on posting this guys, i love a good argument.

Avataris said...

they just want to put you on their little corporate mix tape for some street cred...tryhards! they better not get the satisfaction

are you gonna tell them no thanks anyway? is that in the next episode?...STAY TUNED!!